3 months!

Dear Kaya,
I cannot believe that you've been here over three months. The last time I wrote on here I didn't think you would be here only two weeks later and I would be too busy to write for three months. Our whole life has completely changed... But in the most amazing ways possible!  Everything is different, but also better. We love having you in our life. We love holding you, kissing you, doing everything for you. Your little face lights up our lives.  There really are no words to describe it. Motherhood is a miracle. Being a wife and mom are my favorite things ever! I'm glad I graduated from college and the things I learned can definitely be applied to my everyday life, but being a wife and mother is the best job ever. I wouldn't trade it for anything. It's hard and tiring and trying and by no means am I good at it, but it is noble and divine and it gives me the opportunity multiple times a day to draw closer to my Heavenly Father.
Kaya, you're getting more and more fun everyday. You are now cooing and gooing and "talking" to us. You're most talkative right before you get cranky- sleepy. It's super cute! You'll coo and giggle and smile for a few minutes and then something snaps and you fuss as cry until you get in your crib with your binki. Then you're out like a light.
You're also starting to actually grip things. The other day you were supposed to be napping when I hear you start crying. I came in your room to find you with a handful of your own hair. You were pulling on it pretty hard, making yourself cry. I loosened your grip, you took a deep breath, and then you zonked out. Or another time I came in and you had a hold of your bow and were holding it about 4 inches out from your face. I was nervous you were going to let go and it was going to snap back in your face. Needless to say that I now remove your bows while you nap.
Your legs are getting really strong. You like to push up onto them while people hold you. Today I laid you down for a nap, ten minutes later I hear you fussing. I walked in to find that you had scooted a good twelve inches up in your crib and your face was underneath the stuffed elephant in your crib. He's gonna need to find a new home now that you're on the move.
Kaya, you are adorable. Your dad and I love everything about you! You are perfect for us! :) We love you Kaya Bug!

Hiccups

Dear Baby,

You have the hiccups... again.  You get them ALL. THE. TIME.  I say that I hate it, but really I actually secretly love it.  I was thinking this time around how much I'm going to miss it.  I'm going to miss feeling all of your little movements - even (or maybe especially) the really obnoxious ones - like your rhythmic, seemingly never-ending hiccups that happen at least 3 times a day.  Or your kick-and-slide across my ribs routine that you usually do right as I'm about to doze off to sleep.  Really though, I've loved having you so close and being able to connect with you in a way that no one else ever will.  And as much as I sometimes complain about it and as often as it keeps me up at night, I really am going to miss it.  I love looking down to see my belly contorting into all sorts of shapes and bulges.  Lately you've been doing this stretch where your feet kick up under my right ribs and your head pushes down to the left side and my belly is stretched out on the diagonal.  It's still so crazy to me to think that there is a little life inside of me.  What an incredible miracle!  But soon (hopefully soon 'cause I am feeling very large and very ready for you to come) you're not going to be inside of me anymore.  But you'll be here with us and your daddy will be able to hold you (and you'll be able to keep him up all night).  And I think that will be even sweeter.  So as much as I'll miss having you inside of me, it'll be more than worth it once you're finally here with us and we can always see you.

I saw this video the other day and it made me realize how blessed I am to be able to feel you move inside of me.

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/lifestyle/2013/06/huggies-creates-belt-for-dad-to-feel-the-babys-kick/

Your daddy would LOVE to be able to experience this.  I think he feels a little left out sometimes.  He loves to sing to you and talk to you and blow raspberries on my tummy to get you to move around.  He tells you good morning and asks how your day was and kisses you goodnight.  He calls you Kaya-bug and I love it.  I think it's so cute.  He's going to spoil you (but not rotten) once you get here.  He's not going to want to share you with anyone and I'm totally okay with that.  Your daddy and I love you so much!  We are so happy to have you join our family!  Get here soon, okay?  But just be healthy and strong.

Love you Kaya-bug!
Love, Mommy

Never Say Never, Whatever You Do

Dear Baby,

Have I mentioned that your Daddy is FUNNY!? 'Cause he is.  Tonight, I was sitting at the table studying for a really big test that I have this week and he was in the kitchen doing the dishes (which I love him dearly for... he's been doing everything around the house to help me out).  Complaining about the amount of material I needed to study I said to him, "I'm never going to finish all of this."
Next thing I know I hear him sing, in a French accent (and a VERY good one, I might add) "Never say never, whatever you do!"
I, a little surprised, then asked with a giggle, "Who are you?"
He, in his normal speaking voice, replied, "Apparently I'm a French man singing about positivity."
It made my whole day and brought a much needed smile to my face.  I actually laughed for a good long while.

I love your Daddy SO much!  I'm excited for you to meet him.  He already loves you so much!  He's gonna be your best friend. He's gonna make you giggle so much and it's gonna be my new favorite thing. :)

LOVE

I have been taken this 14-day challenge to try to LOVE more.  President Thomas S. Monson said, “Love is the very essence of the gospel, and Jesus Christ is our Exemplar.”  I know that if we want to be better followers of Him, we need to be more. We need to LOVE more. And I want to be a better follower and disciple of Jesus Christ.  There is a scripture that I've been thinking of a lot lately.  It's from the Book of Mormon, Moroni 7:47-48:  "But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day,it shall be well with him.  Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become the [children] of God; that when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure. Amen."

I want to be filled with that kind of love - the pure love of Jesus Christ.  And I think that this 14-day challenge can help me do just that.

Day 1: It may have been cheating, but I tried to have patience with myself. That included: slacking off a little on homework to take a much needed nap, walking really slow and being okay with the fact that I was late to class so I didn't slip on the ice and snow and slush and fall on my face, and letting my handsome, wonderful husband make and clean up dinner. It was a challenge but I think I succeeded.

Day 2: I was bound and determined overlook the shortcomings of others today.  As I went throughout my day I kept trying to remind myself of it.  But I couldn't find anyone else's shortcomings to overlook.  When I got home from work and school I started to tell James about my day.  I told him the things I felt I should've done differently or could've done better.  I told him about my faults and inadequacies.  Then I started telling him about how I was having a hard time with the Love Challenge today.  He asked me more about it and told him that I just couldn't even find any shortcomings in others to overlook.  He sweetly reminded me that sometimes loving others starts with loving ourselves.  He said that usually people have to be reminded to love others as much as they love themselves.  He said that for me it was the other way around - I needed to be reminded to love myself as much as I love others.  I realized the only shortcomings I had seen throughout the day were my own and that instead of overlooking them I was magnifying them and blowing them out of proportion.  I was tenderly reminded that the Lord's command to "Love thy neighbor as thyself" has two parts.  1. Love others. 2. Love ourselves.  Both are equally important.  I forget that second one sometimes.  I'm grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who overlooks our shortcomings and loves us unconditionally.  I'm grateful for His sweet reminders and the reassurance of His love for me.

I'll let you know how Day 3 goes :)

Christmas: How Would it Have Been?

I have been thinking a lot of the Christmas Nativity story and those who were apart of the Savior's birth.  I've often wondered what it would have been like to be there and I've tried this year to find ways to put myself into the Nativity story.  I recently watched a short video about Joseph and wondered what it must have been like to be chosen as the earthly parent of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  That sparked more thought, as a soon-to-be mom, about how it must have been for Mary.  So many thoughts were swimming around in my mind that I took some time to ponder and I tried to put a few of them down on paper.  And here's the little poem that ensued.  I also highly recommend watching "The First Christmas Spirit" - it's the video I mentioned about Joseph.

Christmas: How Would it Have Been?

Kind, gentle Joseph, so humble and good,

took Mary to wife as he was told he should.

He was close to the Spirit and just and true, 

Obedient in all things the Lord asked him to do.

How would it have been for Joseph, meek and mild

to be the mortal father of the precious Christ child?

To be an example to The Exemplar and King,

truly could have been no easy thing.

The virgin Mary, sweet and loving too, 

may have been nervous for what she was chosen to do.

To bear a son who would be the Savior of all,

Yet, with great faith she accepted the call.

How would it have been for Mary, fair,

to mother sweet Jesus and tend to His care?

To nurture and comfort The Prince of Peace,

would have required her love to never cease.

The shepherds heard of peace on earth,

as they received joyful news of Christ's birth.

They went with haste to see Jesus the baby,

then went forth and to all, shared their testimony.

How would it have been as shepherds to believe,

the words of the angel and glad tidings receive?

To be poor shepherds seeking the Lamb of God,

would be a humbling path upon which to trod.

The wisemen searched in the East for the star,

they had studied, and prayed and traveled afar.

Despite their own learning, they sought God's wisdom,

and arrived at the place where the Messiah had come.

How would it have been for these wisemen of old,

to come bearing gifts of myrrh, frankincense and gold?

To the Light of the World, what could they offer Him,

that did not seem meager and humble and dim?

How would it have been in that stable there,

the night of the birth of our Savior fair?

Would we have watched with wondering awe,

and rejoiced at the miracle which we saw?

Would we, like Joseph, have willingly obeyed,

and followed the Spirit and not delayed?

Would we, like Mary, have been faithful and smart,

and pondered this miracle in our heart?

Would we, like the shepherds, come with eager haste

realizing that we had not a moment to waste?

Would we, like the wisemen, have known signs of His birth,

esteeming the Christ child to be of highest worth?

While we were not there all those years ago,

we can still, now, our Christmas spirit show.

We can develop the attributes of those in this story, 

and then, like them, come to know Christ and His glory.

We can rejoice in His coming all year long,

And follow His light so we never go wrong.

He is the Savior and Redeemer of mankind,

He raised the dead, healed the sick and the blind.

He loved and served and walked on water,

He taught the doctrine and will of the Father.

He showed us the way, fasted and prayed,

And pleased His Father as He perfectly obeyed.

The miracle of His life began with His birth,

when as an infant He came to earth.

Merry Christmas!  I hope the light and love of our Savior fills your hearts and homes this holiday season and all year long!